Guilty Crowns
by i.forgive.you
Summary: As the first Wizarding War rages on in the world outside, the students of Hogwarts deal with their own issues of life and love. Can they find who they are before they are plunged into the war looming outside of the school's walls.


"What's got you in a twist Moony?" Sirius asked his friend. He knew what had James so upset. The boy was lying on his bed, staring up at the ceiling without saying a word. He'd been silent since Lily Evans had stormed off.

Pretty and smart the girl always seemed to see right through everyone including James who was head over heels for her. It was one of the reasons that he insisted on tormenting Severus Snape so much. Not that Sirius minded. The boy was  
a Slytherin just like so many people in Sirius's family. There was a dark place in his heart for everyone in that House and he had no problem keeping Snape near the top of that list.

Remus sat in a chair next to his own ed, his lips pursed into a thin line. "You shouldn't have done that James," he said finally.

Sirius blinked in surprise before his eyes flicked over to where James was still lying on the bed seemingly oblivious to what was going on at the moment. Sirius reached up and smacked his friend's head causing James to jerk straight up.

Frowning back at Sirius, he rubbed the back of his head. "What was that for?" he snapped.

Rolling his eyes, Sirius gestured to Remus who was standing now, his arms crossed over his chest. Their friend tended to frown quite a bit, but there was something different about this look on his face and it wasn't something that Sirius liked to  
see. "What's wrong Moony?" James asked looking between Remus and Sirius. "What did I miss?"

"You shouldn't have done what you did James. It was wrong," Remus said shaking his head. "Snape didn't deserve that."

James let out an exasperated sigh and rolled his eyes. "Come off it Moony. We were just having a bit of fun. Besides, it wasn't any more than that git deserved." There was a venom in James's tone that actually took Sirius by surprise. He  
had always known that his cousin hated the other boy, perhaps he just hadn't realized quite how much.

Remus was already shaking his head before James even finished. "It went too far this time James. Everyone saw that except for you and that is a serious problem! Why do you hate him so much? Because he's smarter than you? Because  
he's in Slytherin House? Or is it because he was always friends with Lily Evans and she wouldn't give you the time of day?"

The look on James's face wasn't one that Sirius saw very often and it instantly put the boy on edge. Jumping between James and Remus, he grabbed the back of his cousin's neck and looked back at Remus. "Go! Now!" he snapped before looking back  
at James. "Calm down mate. Just breathe. Moony's our friend, remember?" he asked trying to get the other boy to focus. It was probably a good thing that Pettigrew had scrambled off somewhere else after the whole debacle. Though  
the boy tried, he probably would have just made things worse.

He had a bad habit of lacking a spine which was necessary when you were dealing with James, especially if he got in a mood like now.

When the door slammed shut, Sirius felt a sense of relief. At least Remus wouldn't end up meeting James's fist. Now that was something that only Sirius had to worry about and honestly he didn't mind it. A punch was one thing. Besides,  
he'd been living with James's temper for so long that it really didn't bother him anymore, but he wouldn't subject anyone else to it.

"You calm?" he asked looking into James's hazel eyes which were dark with rage.

His cousin's lips were twisted with rage. "He had no right!" he growled, his whole body tense. Sirius sighed. It seemed like it was going to be one of those days. Not something that he ever looked forward to, but it was a price that you had  
to pay for family and James was the only family that he could honestly say that he gave a shit about. He'd always been closer to his cousin even than he had been to his brother Regulus.

Then again, that was what happened when one son was everything their parents wanted and the other wasn't.

"Maybe not, but he said it. Just breathe James. No point in getting worked up and saying something you might regret," he pointed out. "Besides, we owe Moony a lot. He's the right to be upset about something just like we do."

James's eyes narrowed at Sirius, his lips pressing into a thin line. "You're taking his side?" he snapped angrily.

Sirius couldn't help but roll his eyes and shake his head. "C'mon Prongs, that isn't what I meant," he said, but his cousin didn't seem inclined to listen.

Shoving Sirius away, James turned his back on the other boy, arms crossing over his chest. "Get out Black," he ordered, his voice cold.

"James-"

"Get out!" James shouted. Sirius jerked back as if the other boy had hit him. His lips pressed into a thin line before he sighed and stormed out. He wasn't sure what was wrong with his cousin, but he knew the problem: Severus Snape.

The Snake needed to learn his place.

Peter peeked into classroom relieved to find it not quite empty. Sitting on one of the few desks left in the room was exactly who he'd been looking for. She'd twisted up her dirty blonde hair into a bun and her Hufflepuff robes exchanged for  
an oversized sweater and skirt. Sneaking up behind her, Peter smiled as he reached up and covered her eyes. "Guess who?"

He could feel her smile growing as she turned and threw her arms around him. "Peter! I was wondering if I'd get to see you again before classes!" Grace said as she pulled back. "Are you sure that your friends don't mind you wandering off?"

He couldn't help but feel a little anxious as he pulled back and scuffed his shoes on the ground. "They're just hanging out in the dorms. Lily yelled at James so he's not too happy right now," Peter said with a shrug.

Grace frowned as she uncurled her legs and stepped down from the desk to look up at Peter. Gently taking his face in her hands, she forced him to look down at her. "What did you do Peter?" she asked.

It wasn't the words that hurt, but rather the look on her face. Grace was such a gentle girl, a good person. She was far better than Peter himself was and he hated the thought that he might have upset her. "It wasn't anything Gracie. I  
mean that I wasn't-"

"Don't Gracie me Peter, what did you do?" she asked. He looked up to find that she'd planted her fists on her hips. She was so tiny and yet, he was terrified that he might have disappointed her. He knew he would disappoint her when he  
told her what happened. There was something so good inside of Grace and Peter… Peter was always so afraid of anything and everything around him. He didn't want to disappoint her, but he knew that he was going to.

"I'm sorry Grace," he said with a sigh. "I just… I don't know how to tell them no. Sirius and James get so excited and I get excited, and…"

Grace sighed. Reaching up, she gently cupped Peter's face again and he could feel her warmth moving into him. He looked at her only to see a little smile rather than the rage he so feared. "Oh Peter… you have to learn to tell them no. You  
don't deserved to be destroyed by their foolishness and your love for them."

Peter couldn't help but cringe as he turned away from Grace, a frown pursing his lips into a thin line. "They're not bad guys Grace." They were his friends. They were the ones that he admired. He'd always admired them and always would until  
the day that he died. He couldn't imagine not thinking well of them. "Besides… things just… y'know, they happen. And it's not like he doesn't ask for it. Did you know that Snape called Lily a mudblood today!"

Grace sighed and shook her head. Peter found his eyes darting away again, the shame rising up inside of him once more. He had hoped that his explanation would be enough for her, but until he knew it was, he couldn't look at her. He found  
himself too afraid to.

"So did they attack him to defend Lily?" she asked softly.

Peter felt himself scuffing his shoes against the stone floor. "Well… he did that… after she tried to defend him… from James," he found himself getting quieter and quieter with every word. He didn't want Grace to be right about this. As much  
as he cared about her, as good as she was, he didn't want her to be right. Because if she was right, what did that say about him? He admired and adored James and Sirius and Remus. What would he do if they were somehow in the wrong?

He couldn't even imagine that.

"What he did was wrong Peter. But bullying isn't right either," she pointed out in a gentle voice.

"We're not bullying!" Peter defended quietly, panic rising up inside of him. "We just…" he trailed off not certain what to say, how to justify it when she put it like that. They weren't bullying someone, were they? He didn't think he'd ever  
be that kind of person. He felt sick to his stomach as he tried to figure it out. How did he fix this? Could he make what he felt reconcile with what Grace was telling him? He wanted to, he just didn't know how.

Sighing, Grace grabbed her bookbag from where it was sitting on the desk she'd been on when he'd entered the room. "This isn't something that I can figure out for you Peter. I know that they're your friends and I know how much you care for them.  
It's one of the things that I admire about you so much. But one day, you have to decide what you really believe in. There is a reason that you were put in Gryffindor House." Closing the distance between them, Grace went up onto  
her tiptoes and placed a gentle kiss on Peter's cheek.

"Grace…"

She pulled back and gave him a sad little smile. He could feel his heart breaking with that single look, something he'd never experienced before in his life. It was unsettling, to put it mildly. He just didn't know what he was supposed  
to do about it or how he could possibly fix it. "I'll always be here for you Peter… but I can't just sit around and listen to you talk about bullying someone, anyone… no matter the reason." Stepping around him, Grace walked out of the room.

It felt like Peter was being punched in the stomach. He hadn't actually told James or Sirius or even Remus about the time that he spent with Grace and, at the moment, he was seriously regretting that choice. How could he ask for advice when  
they probably wouldn't even believe the problem that he had.

Slumping back against one of the desks, he buried his face in his hands and let out a heavy sigh. He could feel his body slumping as if he might simply melt into a puddle. And he honestly wasn't sure how he was supposed to fix it. What  
he had done… what was wrong with that? And if it was so wrong, why would Sirius and James do it at all?

Gryffindors were supposed to be the good guys.

They weren't bullies.

Letting time slip by, Peter knew that eventually, he was going to have to go back to the dorms. He just didn't think he could bare to face his friends. He just needed a little while longer. A little while more with his thoughts. Maybe  
this was a problem that, for once, he could figure out on his own.


End file.
